Henry probably plotting Rina’s demise…
When Henry was around one-year-old he, as some kids around that age do, bit Rina.
Rina: “Joshik just bit me!”
Matt: “You have to bite him back so he knows it hurts and doesn’t do that anymore.”
Rina stared at me blankly for a moment.
Rina: “Really?”
I stared back at her for a moment.
Matt: “No, don’t bite the baby.”
Rina: “Oh, okay, I thought you were serious.”
Andrea Bocelli accepting what I assume is his usual award for destroying relationships…
Rina and I both like opera and classical music, as well as some operatic pop. One performer we appreciate very much is Andrea Bocelli, who occasionally goes on tour and comes to our area but we’d never managed to catch his show. During his last tour, I bought tickets as a gift for Rina and we anxiously waited for the concert date. A few days before we we were scheduled to go, we were both upstairs in the bedroom and I started cleaning out the night stand next to my side of the bed. One of the things I pulled out was an old pair of Bochelli tickets from a few years before. I suddenly remembered that we’d seen him previously, and I even recalled the venue, the SAP Center in San Jose. I chuckled and held up the tickets and we commenced to have one of our typical conversations: Continue reading
Not the panties in question. (c) Peloponnesian Folklore Foundation
A few weeks ago I got home in the afternoon and started doing the laundry. As I was throwing clothes into the washer, one of the socks overshot the machine and went down between the wall and the washer. I grabbed a broom and fished it out, and along with the sock I found a pair of lacy black panties. I threw both into the washer without thinking and hit the start button and walked away.
That evening I folded the clothes, and put Rina’s on her side of the bed. About an hour later I was in Henry’s room and she came in looking serious and said, “I need to talk to you about something.” And thus we began another one of our typical conversations.
The most vicious wild animal ever. He looks tired, but believe me, he was flexing for a surprise attack…
You may remember that nature tried to eat me about a year ago, and while that might have been a small over-exaggeration, the most recent episode of When Animals Attack (Matt)! just happened for real, because as as we all know, nature finds a way*. Continue reading
This image has nothing to do with the story. I just like looking at it.
I got into a discussion recently about a restaurant that’s completely dark and you can’t see the food being served.
Friend: On an unrelated note have you ever eaten at Opaque?
Matt: Um no. Do I need to?
Friend: Oh it’s closed now. It was a restaurant where it was pitch dark you could not see in front of you at all.
Matt: What?!
Friend: So you would order in the lobby. Then they would take you back and everything would be served in darkness.
Matt: Yeah, no, call me old school, but I wanna see that stuff before I eat it.
Matt: That’s stupid.
Matt: Rina would steal my food.
Friend: I never went there, but I’ve heard it was highly sensual experience.
Matt: Let me guess, “You enhance your taste sense by not seeing it?”
Friend: One guy I know said his date leaned over and kissed him unexpectedly and it was the best kiss he’s ever experienced.
Matt: That’s not a highly sensual experience in the dark.
Matt: IF IT WAS HIS DATE.
Friend: Could be the waiter.
Friend: You. Don’t. Know.
Matt: I can see how this would go…
Rina: “That was amazing”
Matt: “What was?”
Rina: “Never mind.”
Matt: Surprises in the dark are never good. Sorry.
Friend: You are acting your age now.
Friend: Where is your sense of fun and adventure?
Matt: Honey, why do you have a beard?
My 3-watt laser hitting an Oreo cookie. For science.
Warning: Nerd Alert – if you’re not into science and the skillful application of lasers to burn, burst, or melt objects you may want to skip this chapter.
I’m very fond of all things science, but especially lasers. I got my first one when I was about 14-years-old, and over the years, my interests in lasers only grew. For a while I even worked at a company in southern Arizona that made an array of laser scanners for military, industrial and commercial uses. In fact, when the space shuttle Challenger was destroyed due to cold O-rings, my company got a phone message from the contractor who built the solid rocket boosters, Morton Thiokol, inquiring as to whether we could build a laser flatness detector (more properly a laser interferometer), which works by the same mechanism that creates the holograms like on your credit cards. Continue reading
Things of Little Importance 